What have you gained?

Something that we all know, something we've all felt; Yet everytime it strikes, we can't seem to deal with it. Pain.  In our western culture we always run from things, we run from our debt by getting drunk, we run from the reality that is death of loved ones by getting high, but really what does it have we gained in this western world. In my life at the moment, all i've done is run. After just finding out some sad news about a person I love so much, who has changed my life; I'm wondering what is the point of it all. I mean really, waht is the actual reason for everyting, it just seems the second we say to God, "Okay, change me. I'll give in". We are hit with a mass of trials and a mass of pain. Why does this God seem to promise abundence of life and then give us a cruddy situation where people seem to be dying left right and centre. WHY? Because of what we learn and what we gain from those trials, builds us to the people that we are going to become. That through every trial we learn something more about us and something more about him. That when Life sucks and we can no longer move, somehow he moves us, somehow He gives us the means to keep going and to fight another day. God never promised an easy life, all he said was He'd never leave; but we learn far more from someone who never leaves than we do from someone who lets it be easy. When you have joy in the face of a trial and you can look to the future and say "I know who's got me in His arms". Mabey, the whole point of the crap is to learn about the good, and what is important. When people are on their death bed, they don't ask for their bank balance, they don't ask about the latest gossip and which celebirtys life is going up in flames. They ask for friends and family, they ask about situations that are going on and they care for others. SO my real question is: Why do we leave it untill something tragic happens to really evaluate our lives? In western culture we have become so wrapped up in what we should be doing and we've become so wrapped up in getting to the next stage, we forget that all the pain is there to get us to a better place.